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Today’s post was written by Anitra, one of our peer advocates.

She has bravely chosen to share her personal experience with the hope that it will help others recognize the signs of an abusive relationship.

You know that saying that there’s truth in every joke? If he’s your real boyfriend, you should be able to tell your parents about him and even bring them with you to meet him. You wouldn’t meet him alone, I know you’re smarter than that.

The thing is, that this guy is a virtual boyfriend. Even if it’s just on Skype, you should totally have your family and friends meet him!

Abusive relationships are tough situations that can happen to anyone.

No matter how much you talk, no matter how many different ways you communicate (Skype, IM, Facebook), you’re only getting to know one side of him.

Your friends shouldn’t make fun of you, but there’s still a big stigma around dating online, and for good reason. But your boyfriend might be cool, so I’m not saying you should dump him tomorrow. If he is your boyfriend, you should be able to introduce him to your friends.


dear heather, I have a boyfriend who I really, really like.

I talk to him for hours and we have SO much in common.

When it comes down to it, someone’s web presence is always the best version of themselves. You put a lot of time and thought into that, right? But as long as they keep thinking that he’s just some dude on the internet, without a face or personality, they’ll probably keep having their doubts. And if he won’t show his face to your friends and family, then g URL, we have a problem.

And if you meet another boy — in person — who knocks your socks off, run with it.

I think I love him, and I can’t stand when they talk bad about him. Long-distance relationships are hard enough, and only knowing your boyfriend through the computer makes things even more complicated.

As much as you might like your boyfriend, the relationship isn’t the same as it would be if you knew him in person.


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