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A "surfer" can immediately focus on people with similar interests, beliefs, age and other important criteria without having to spend time and money "going for coffee." Non-matching people can be sidestepped without ever needing to make contact.

It's "partner shopping" in a global supermarket of humanity.

Instead, the older man probably has an established and well-organized routine that has worked for him for years, and he doesn’t want to alter it.

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If a "surfer" is not witty or doesn't write well, online dating can be difficult.Prospects often circulate constantly thru a host of sites. This can make for cynical or dismissive prospects with little care for how their rejections or non-contact affects the feelings of others. Most humans are addicted to initial flirtations and the "drug" of being liked, appreciated and wanted. The connection is based on internalized and selfish feelings, often projections of what we are looking for, rather than what the other person is actually like.

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