Before she started online dating, Jo Elliott had two ‘semi-serious’ relationships.After travelling during her 20s, she decided she was ready to settle down. charts her often hilarious online exploits, says it can be difficult to trust what men tell you — whether it’s a white lie about their appearance or more serious fabrications.‘While I’ll never know for sure, I think he’d split up from her when he first went on the internet.But is this a trend that could change the very nature of romance and turn long-term commitment into a thing of the past? There is striking evidence to suggest that the web is causing social change.Traditionally, women might have had one or two boyfriends before getting married; now, they are encouraged to date lots of people in a quest to find a perfect partner.Over the past decade, she’s tried ten websites, had dates with 40 men and chatted — online or over the phone — to countless other potential suitors.
With an unlimited number of other people on offer via the internet, there’s little incentive to work it out if things get tough.
And with the cloak of anonymity the net provides, it’s never been easier to be unfaithful.‘The internet has opened up this sense of “Where do I stop? ‘In previous generations, people met a partner and accepted they wouldn’t be perfect in every aspect, but internet dating is like a chocolate box that never stops giving.
‘It’s left men and women on a never-ending hunt for the perfect partner, thinking: “A few more dates and I’ll find The One.” In my work, I’ve met plenty of women who think there’s always a better guy out there.‘The danger is that it results in a string of meaningless flings.
Apart from the risk of sexually transmitted disease, ultimately a never-ending quest for grass that’s greener means that women (and men) don’t face the realities of relationships.
While she had plenty of male friends, nothing developed romantically, so she signed up to a dating site. But they got back together, probably when he first disappeared, and later he wanted a bit on the side.‘Some are upfront, but many are not honest.
There are men who say they’re looking for a serious relationship, but when you chat online it becomes clear they don’t or they’ve already got a partner.