I use this example not because I am trying to argue that Koreans or other Asians are in no way prejudiced all by themselves and that those biased ways of seeing things may impede an otherwise decent romantic relationship; rather, I am merely trying to illustrate a degree of complexity to this issue which I feel is oftentimes overlooked.
During and after college, I have maintained a diverse group of friends and have had the good fortune to travel to various places in Asia including a two year stint in Korea and Taiwan, as well as less extensive periods in Hong Kong, Japan, and mainland China.
Moreover, I have dated both intra- and inter-racially (with Black women among others) and was most recently in a 3 year relationship with a Black American woman (who self-identified as such).
My dad is of mixed European ancestry and self-identifies as White, and my mom is half Puerto Rican and half Italian and identifies as multi-racial (however, she acknowledges that she can oftentimes pass for White and as such does benefit from White privilege).
I grew up in a predominantly White area and was one of the only Asian American students for the entirety of my grammar and high school career.
While I can see some potential obstacles which could prove to be problematic such as issues of colorism, the desire to maintain cultural traditions by dating within one’s own ethnic group, etc., if we interrogate the underlying reasons for their existence, it becomes increasingly evident that none are necessarily specific to the Asian American community and should therefore in no way discourage Black American women from considering Asian men as potential partners.
Before I get to the heart of my response, perhaps I should preface it with a little information about myself.
I am a 32 year old Korean American man who was adopted from South Korea when I was nine months old.