Then, of course, if everything goes well, is there going to be a date or are you going to be waiting by the phone that never rings, desperately trying to summon up your latent telepathy and trying to implant the idea of calling you back through thought projection?
Fortunately, it’s all pretty simple, as long as you keep your head.
If you want to get that second date, you need to know how to ace the first date and what common pitfalls and mistakes you need to avoid. You want to focus on three things: fun, conversation and a hint of sexual tension.
You want your date to go home thinking about what a great guy she just hung out with and how much fun it would be to see him again.
This is why most of my favorite first dates are structured to avoid the “audition” frame that so many first dates turn in to – sitting awkwardly across from each other, asking the 10 standard getting-to-know-you questions everybody asks and spending most of the date inside your own head instead of, y’know, enjoying yourselves.
This is one of the reasons I prefer to avoid the coffee date and the dinner-and-a-movie date: they’re cliche and boring and minimize any real chance for interaction.
Even so: a coffee date can be made more than just strangers asking questions while trying to pretend that the Starbucks they’re drinking doesn’t taste like burned ass. Some double as music venues – some in Austin even have improv and stand up comedy performances.
You’re stressing where to take her, what to say, who’s going to pay for what and – most of all – do you go for the kiss at the end of the night?
Now think about how you position yourself on a first date: sitting awkwardly across from one another from across a table while you ask questions and hope you don’t screw up.
An important, yet often neglected key to avoiding the awkward “interview” vibe on a first date is positioning.
Think of your average job interview: you’re staring nervously at your prospective employer who sits behind their massive desk as she asks the questions that decide your fate.
My only real exception to this rule is for online dating; a low-investment date like coffee is more about a gut check than an actual You’re checking how you feel about one another when you meet in the flesh…not to mention doing basic due diligence, trying to make sure that one or the other isn’t a psycho axe-murdering cannibal.